Divorce.......good the bad and the ugly

Discussion in 'Everything Else' started by RonnieLuv17, Jan 6, 2012.

  1. RonnieLuv17

    RonnieLuv17 Member

    What are your views and opinions on divorce? Have you gotten one?
    I have never been married so I have not witnessed it yet, hopefully I won't come to that in the future though.
    I have seen some ugly divorces over the years though. Some were okay, they just didn't feel that love for one another anymore, but still became friends for the kids sake.
    Others were ugly!!! oy!
     
  2. dimess

    dimess New Member

    I have been divorced for almost 3 years. It was by far the most difficult experience of my life. But the hardest part about divorce is the way it affects the children that are involved. I have 2 kids, and I can honestly say that it has been far harder on them than it was on me. They now have 2 households to live in and travel back and forth to, and they have to learn to be without the other parent for periods of time. I think that the best way to handle such difficult circumstances is to try your best to get along with your ex. My ex-husband and I bought houses 2 blocks away from eachother, we talk every day, and we still celebrate every holiday together.
     
  3. RonnieLuv17

    RonnieLuv17 Member

    Wow that is amazing, I'm serious. Good for you both though, I know how it can be hard on the children I have been there with my parents who've divorced when I was only 5, but the fact that you guys try to get along and everything is just cool. My cousin is now starting to go through that and hates her ex to pieces, I know that if they cheat on you its wrong and all but try to not show the hate in front of the children.
     
  4. Norikasonei

    Norikasonei New Member

  5. RonnieLuv17

    RonnieLuv17 Member

    yes.....oy
     
  6. Pratik SAnghvi

    Pratik SAnghvi New Member

    I haven't married yet but I have witnessed other divorced people and i must say that it is a very bad thing. Like you love someone for 10 years and you get divorced in the second year of your marriage. Very shattering :( . Divorce just ruins the life of the people and for sometime it becomes too difficult to come out of it. Divorced couples who have kids face a nightmare cos kids with 1 parent, it very bad to imagine.
     
  7. Egtrab

    Egtrab New Member

    My ex husband and I met October 2006. We were married October 2009 divorice official July 2011. There were tiny signs and doubts I had prior to the marriage that I ignored, I said it was just nerves. Even though we lived together for years prior to placing those rings on each others fingers, it was not the same after. Things changed, he treated me different, our "roles" were suposed to be different now that we were "husband and wife" not just "Brad and Jessica" anymore. (not real names) My wedding day was the happiest.day of my life. Now, nine months later, im still dealing with him. Im sorting out varrious financial messes and my name is still on the morgage of the house we purchased together, that he kept. We dont have any children, so that does make this a bit easier.
     
  8. wordtrance

    wordtrance New Member

    My opinion regarding divorce is that it is the last option when there is nothing else that can save a couple's marriage. I have been through a divorce and it was devastating. Although for me I did hope for reconciliation at one point, it was also a blessing in disguise that I have finally come to terms with it because I would have been miserable for the next years to come had I not let go of him sooner. If you take time in getting to know your partner, you will know if that person is the right one for you. There should be mutual love and respect, and both of you should take good care of each other. I have found someone who is the right one for me and that's why I'm able to give advice like this to someone else.
     
  9. JudsGirl68

    JudsGirl68 New Member

    I got married when I was 21, I also happened to be 9 months pregnant. I went into labor on my wedding night, and had my daughter the next day. That marriage ended in divorce... hahaha :) I have been married to my current husband for 3 years, and every day is amazing. Just make sure you find the right one :)
     
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  10. toni_s

    toni_s Member

    I used to be against divorce because I feel sorry for kids who are from broken families. I thought that if there is no divorce, family would stay intact, thus, saving the kids from pain of losing a parent and family. I also come from a conservative Catholic family that is against divorce.

    However, as I mature, I realized that there are other factors to consider for us to be able to understand why divorce should be made legal.

    One of the main reasons why I am now supporting the concept of divorce is due to many cases of violence against women, mostly committed by their husband. My religion recommends counseling to the wife and husband, which I think does not work all the time. What if the husband is mentally ill or he refuse to undergo counseling? Would the wife just be left with no other options but to live as a 'punching bag' of her husband?

    Aside from cases of battered wives, there are also cases of child abuse committed by either parent, and the other parent would want to resort to divorce to protect the child. In this case, I believe that the abused child must be left in the custody of the legally and mentally fit parent, away from the abusive parent. Divorce should also come to the rescue.

    I know that it is very important to keep every family intact. But in the midst of violence and abuse, that does not make any sense at all.

    Just my humble opinion.
     
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  11. beckyv1265

    beckyv1265 Member

    Divorce. Lets see I married my first husband when I was 17. That marriage lasted about 2 months. I had that one annuled. So maybe that doesn't count as a divorce. It did give a beautiful daughter though so i am eternaly greatful for the experience. My second marriage lasted 2 years. That did end in divorce. His first love was alcohol second was sports, I was somwhere down around the bottom. Lol But alas another beautiful daughter. lol I think he is still drunk watching football somewhere. My third husband lasted around 10 years and we had 4 beautiful children. He is an ok guy , He just suffers from extreme OCD. Lets face it folks life with a bunch of kids and OCD doesn't create harmony. lol. He happily lives in an apartment by himself were his cupboards are always neat and nobody moves anything out of place. I lived with a man for about 6 years after that. Things were ok we had 2 beautiful boys . Things went down hill when I discovered he was addicted to meth. lol Since kids and druggs don't mix I booted him.
    I have been living in a fabulouse relationship for last 4 years with a wonderful man who adores all of my little monsters. We have a great life. The kids are happy. They see their various dads when the dads get around to it. One thing I do see . Is that kids are happy if the parents are happy. Divorce doesn't have to be Ugly. It can be great as well. I enjoy a good relationship with many of my exes.
     
  12. ACrouch80

    ACrouch80 New Member

    I have been married for 4 years now, and have never been divorced. My mom was married and divorced 4 times. I remember how hard it was for me as a child to have men coming in and out of my life. I vowed to never do that to my children. That being said, sometimes it just doesn't work no matter what you do or how hard you try.
     
  13. bocknoy

    bocknoy New Member

    It is sad to know that the marriage is not as sacred as it was before. But what seems to happen is that, people just decide on getting into a lifetime commitment before giving it a serious thought. I married in the Philippines two years ago, and so far, my marriage life is going well. I guess being raised in a Christian community have influenced the way me and my husband recognize the sanctity of marriage. True to what the author said, modern societies view marriage merely as a legal contract, something that can be terminated. And I agree that people with a religious inclination (whatever sect it may be) are more likely to keep their marriage vows and live a happy married life.
     

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