How to deal with break up?

Discussion in 'Books' started by Mia09, May 18, 2019.

  1. Mia09

    Mia09 Member

    Please give me some advice on how to deal with heartbreaking moments your life. I know everyone has experience this sensation.
     
  2. git531

    git531 Member

    to deal with a break up you'll need the following or at least some of the following:
    1. good friends - very important
    2. traveling, lots of
    3. good music to make up your mood
    4. good movies to pass the time.
    5. and if you are a girl- then go shopping.
     
    2 people like this.
  3. TonyDaniels

    TonyDaniels New Member

    Cry- to that moment you have to pour out your pain through tears. It will help you lessen the pain and makes you feel lighter.
    Talk- talk with your friends it is a meaningful moment to share your experience to them.
    Walk- have yourself some walk to lessen your pain.
    Watch- watch movie such as inspirational.
     
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  4. jackiejackie

    jackiejackie Member

    Close one door and another opens.

    Breaking up could be very devastating that even if the sun is shining, the world is still a gloomy, cold place. Each breath you take is painful, and yes, rain streams down your face.

    But you know, crying till you get tired from it will help you move on. Find someone to talk to, enjoy with your friends or family, go somewhere refreshing, and keep yourself busy. Above all, pray. God loves you and has better plans for you.
     
    1 person likes this.
  5. memez4savages

    memez4savages New Member

    Try to improve yourself.
    Go to the gym
    meditate
    eat healthy
    read informational books
    do NoFap
    you will find happiness with yourself and not on another person. By improving yourself you will be happy even if you're alone.
     
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  6. smga22

    smga22 New Member

    It’s a tough situation for anybody who goes through this. In this situation, it’s better to be positive. You might think you could be in a worse situation than this one. Meet your friends, spend most of the time with your family, try to help the needy people as much as you can, listen to your favorite music. Share your feelings with someone you trust most.
     
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  7. Peachywriter

    Peachywriter New Member

    Breaking up is never an easy thing to handle. Break ups are usually undesired, but unfortunately happen. The best thing you can do is go to your support network and talk through it. Sometimes break ups happen because two people are not compatible. It doesn't necessarily mean that you or the other person is bad. I suggest as well as talking to your support network of friends and family is to focus on yourself. Go out and do things that you enjoy and take some time to make yourself happier. This could also include trying out new things that you always wanted to try but couldn't before.
     
  8. lynsana

    lynsana New Member

    Dealing with break ups it not that easy. To forget someone you love who is constantly in your life then suddenly gone its too much to bare. well first thing you'll do. Is to occupy your self like make your self busy like go for a jog or read a book or go for swim. that will take your mind out of it and last thing never stay alone bring a companion or someone to talk to all the time. for me music doesn't help because it brings back all the memories you have with your so called ex. lastly you have to pampered your self go to saloon. lose weight get fit. take a boxing class or zumba class so that at the end of the day. your to tired to think of him/her and you can sleep a lot better. trust i done that. its 100% effective
     
  9. mayprincessmanalo

    mayprincessmanalo New Member

    Break up is a situation where you feel so down, so much hurt and you can also feel that you not a good person to deserve this kind of situation. Well dealing with break up is too hard especially when the person who broke your heart is the one who really close to you. This person can be your family, friend or maybe your partner. In order for you to forget someone who broke your heart you must start fixing yourself in order to forget what has been done. You must look on the bright side of your life instead of staying on the dark sides. Because there are so many things that can make you happy. There are many people that you can encountered that will make you happy and make you important. In that case always look on the good side and forget what's past for you to move on and have a great day.
     
  10. ohevit

    ohevit Member

    Your reaction to anything, that includes breakups, depends on how you consider events in life. If you consider them happenings that are just part and parcel of living, then you can easily move on. However, if you value your breakup an irreparable loss, then you will be totally lost. As temporary residents here on earth, we should offer every aspect of our lives to God. Let Him define your life. Do not allow negative things such as disappointments, disenchantments or failures or letdowns define you and your life.
     
    1 person likes this.
  11. Always remember this " you will feel great when you realize that you're perfectly happy without the person you thought you needed the most". IF SOMEONE TREATS YOU LIKE AN OPTION, LEAVE THEM LIKE A CHOICE. Maybe you've just met him/her but you are not destined to each other so move on.
     
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  12. nabel86

    nabel86 New Member

    movies always a great way to forget but u have to stay away from romance or comedy romance movies, been there done that and it worked for me .
     
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  13. cesstravels09

    cesstravels09 New Member

    Take time. Read a lot of positive quotes and have someone to confide with. Go out and travel.
    Stop stalking your ex (it's like digging your own grave)
    Cry all you want (it works).
    Based on experience- I took my time crying and venting out to my friends until i get tired of being sad. It is true that only time can tell and only God knows. Focus on getting better especially your outside appearance. Don't be afraid to mingle with our single people. Make friends. It is true that the cure for a heartbreak is finding someone new. Then later on you'll realize why it didn't work out with the previous one.
     
    1 person likes this.
  14. evequicho

    evequicho Member

    Moving on from a relationship is really hard. I agree that you must go out and travel. Do not keep yourself locked up inside your room. The more you stay alone, the sadder and painful you would feel. Be with friends to uplift your spirit.
    Remember that acceptance is a long process. You need friends to bear with it along the way.
     
  15. Anjin

    Anjin Member

    First thing to do is accept it. It will hurt you but this that is only temporary unless you will let your self consume by your emotion. Engaged with your emotion when you feel hurt, but always keep in mind to recover. Let your heart heal, accept that things will end and so your heartbreak. Watch your favorite TV shows, read your favorite book or much better, exercise. This is also a good way to keep your mind and body busy. Focus on your self and engage with your friends and family. They can be very helpful when your heartbroken.
     
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    TOMSHANJ Member

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  17. amylsolis

    amylsolis New Member

    Honestly, everyone handles breakups differently. To some, they’re insignificant, going from person to person like bees pollinating flowers. But to others, a break-up can be devastating. If you are in the latter, then I would suggest to keep yourself busy. Nothing is more detrimental to your heath and state of mind than being stuck at home in bed, with nothing to do, only to have your mind wander back and relive all of the memories you’ve had with your significant other. If it was a clean breakup, or not, you need to realize that a break up is the end. It means, 1) that you need to move on, for your own sake, and 2) that you cannot be friends. Many people believe that if they stay friends then later on it will rekindle something between them. But honestly, from experience, that can only lead to more heartbreak if the other person never truly reciprocated your feelings again. Like previous posts said, go out with friends, family, anyone that you have close by and try to stay busy, whether taking up a hobby or working a little extra, just until time has worked it’s magic and you are able to start heading on your own. It might seem like the end of the world right now, but trust me, you will be okay. I promise.
     
  18. jilibido

    jilibido Member

    TWO WORDS: "MOVE ON!"
    Heartbreaks are hard to heal, Heartaches are even harder to bear..But what's worse is NEVER having the guts to GET OVER it. After a break up, give yourself time to grieve. A few days to a week should suffice. Sure, the memory of your ex-partner would and could constantly pop up and cross your mind, but once it does, divert your focus on other stuff and think how much more important it is for you to love yourself, than to have love for someone who doesn't even give a damn about you.
    The "Serenity Prayer" is a considerably good guideline to go with and recover. You have to be at Peace with yourself to accept the things which you couldn't or can NO LONGER change. Understand that your partner, just like you, also have a mind of their own. They also have the right to make a decision, just like you do, and whether it turns out to be a just or an unfair one - it doesn't matter. What actually matters is how you'd both find a way to "even out the odds", to find and maintain balance, achieve equality and keep the essence of your "togetherness" alive and breathing. Remember: a relationship does not involve just one person, otherwise, what you're having all along, is NOT a relationship at all! And basically that's what we all are powerless to.. the mind..the thinking..the choices, the decisions...the sense of reasoning of your "other half". All of these matters are out of our hands, no longer ours to manipulate, control or take. Thus, these are the fundamental things we must learn how to let go once we decide to get into a relationship. Because being in a relationship does not only concern you, or just your partner alone..both you and your partner have to sacrifice and benefit from the relationship, so, in a sense, Harmony is key. Now, do you think you want to give all that up? Can you really be that generous? So you see, it's actually a risky business to fall in love, so how about not doing that anymore for the time being, eh? Because if your relationship can no longer work out, then that's the time you can go ahead and be SELFISH. Have your cake, eat it and have another one "to go"! Be selfish enough not to care for your partner anymore. Be selfish of your time and do not spend a moment, not even a blink's time reminiscing your ex..because THEY DON'T DESERVE YOU. True to say, Bitterness is an ugly emotion to wallow yourself into while going through a break up..But it's way better to let "Bitterness" take over than to let "Weakness" settle in and take charge. It's better to be bitter than to be sorry. Because in this battlefield, specially if you're on the loosing end...SORRIES are for LOSERS! So go ahead, LOVE YOURSELF. Because you know what...you deserve BETTER...in fact, you deserve the BEST..
    and you know what that is??
    THAT'S being "U"(YOU) without the "X"(ex).
    Therefore, "U" minus "X" = "OK" ∞
    (You minus Ex = OK infinity)
     
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  19. elliethegypsy

    elliethegypsy Member

    First things first, accept that fact that your relationship already ended. Acceptance is the first key to make the process easier for you. I know, it hurts so much that sometimes, you no longer want to go out of bed and just stay at home. But it's part of the process.

    Second, get a support system from your family and friends. Tell them what you feel and let them help you how to divert your attention and feeling to other things. Watch movies, go shopping with your friends, eat out with your family. Get a new look, re-design your room or set a list of goals for your upcoming exams. There are many ways for you to avoid thinking about him or her. It's natural to think about it from time to time but overdo it. It will only be much painful when you reminisce so much the times you're with that person.

    Lastly, think that it's not your loss, it's him or her. You deserve someone better and best thing in the world. Focus on bettering yourself and sooner or later, you'll get over with this person who hurt you.
     
  20. Patrick Larraquel

    Patrick Larraquel New Member

    That's right, separating is difficult to do. At the point when a relationship closes, it's ordinary to feel a feeling of misfortune, as if something is absent from your life. Be that as it may, there are things you can do that may enable you to feel good. Set aside some effort to mend It very well may be hard to dealt with what's occurred. Try not to hope to bob back to your old self right away. Acknowledge that you'll have great days and terrible, yet that it will improve at last. Recover your certaintySet aside a few minutes to do the things that you appreciate – regardless of whether that is spending time with companions, going out to see the films, cooking a decent dinner or taking a long walk. Relax and be benevolent to yourself. Try not to depend on liquor or medications, It may feel enticing to get off your head on liquor or medications and rub out how you're feeling. In any case, at last, that will simply aggravate it and you'll feel significantly progressively hopeless when the high wears off. Adhere to a daily practice Amid a separation, it can feel like a mat has been hauled out from under you. To recover a feeling of control, set a daily schedule for yourself. This can be something as straightforward as having a shower before bed every night, or setting your caution for a 8 am reminder every morning – whatever encourages you to recover a touch of steadiness into your regular daily existence. Convey what needs be

    It's typical to feel desolate after a separation, and it can express this such that feels good to you. That might be by composing a diary section, tuning in to your preferred tunes, taking some break, or conversing with a companion or relative. By grappling with what's occurred, you can mend and proceed onward.
     
    1 person likes this.
  21. shielamae1991

    shielamae1991 New Member

    Hello there Mia09, I'm Shiela by the way. You know what, break-ups aren't easy especially at the first three months after the break-up. All you can see and think, were the happy memories you had with the other person. This is the time your mind will keep thinking of all the reason why the relationship ended. You'll think of the time you invested on the relationship. It'll even come to a point where we blame ourselves for the failed relationship. But you know what, it is normal that way. It is normal that we hurt, it's because we invested our feelings to the other person. But always bear in my mind that you are a strong human being. A woman with pride and dignity. You'll definitely pass all the hurts and pains you are feeling right now. All you have to do is to take it one day at a time. Let yourself heal. Learn to love yourself again. Another thing is, keep yourself busy. Be more active. Channel all the hurt and pain somewhere else. Go out meet some friends. Always think that after all the hurt, you will recover and be happy again.
    Someday you'll realize how it's not hurting anymore. Someday a much better guy will come and sweep you off your feet.
     
  22. cahalhal20

    cahalhal20 New Member

    Forget everything about what have done or what is in the past always look on the bright side and set aside what is hurting you.
     
  23. fajaybar

    fajaybar New Member

    Best way to deal with breakup is to give time for yourself. Make some new friends, that you can speak about your breakup problems. Produce new happy memories. Forget the negative reasons that make you and your partner broke up.
     
  24. kapta

    kapta New Member

    Having to deal with a breakup is one of the worst experiences ever: here are some tips to help you out.

    Take time to heal
    It can be difficult to come to terms with what’s happened. Don’t expect to bounce back to your old self immediately. Accept that you’ll have good days and bad, but that it will get better in the end.

    Get your confidence back
    Make time to do the things that you enjoy – whether that’s hanging out with friends, going to the movies, cooking a nice meal or going for a long walk. Take it easy and be kind to yourself.

    Don’t rely on alcohol or drugs
    It might feel tempting to get off your head on alcohol or drugs and blot out how you’re feeling. But in the end, that’ll just make it worse and you’ll feel even more miserable when the high wears off.

    Stick to a routine
    During a break-up, it can feel like a rug has been pulled out from under you. To regain a sense of control, set a routine for yourself. This can be something as simple as having a shower before bed each night, or setting your alarm for an 8 am wakeup call each morning – whatever helps you to get a bit of stability back into your everyday life.

    Express yourself
    It’s normal to feel lonely after a break-up, and it can help to express this in a way that feels comfortable to you. That may be by writing a journal entry, listening to your favourite tunes, taking some time out, or talking to a friend or family member. By coming to terms with what’s happened, you can heal and move on.
     
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  25. IreneJay

    IreneJay New Member

    Take Care of Your Body.

    Going on a “breakup diet” may sound like a good idea — we often think of looking our best as a way to get revenge on an ex — but it can easily become a way to punish yourself, reinforcing feelings of rejection. (Not to mention encouraging you to develop an unhealthy relationship with food.) Instead of restricting calories, eat nourishing whole foods that are high in fiber, protein and nutrients to boost your mood and energy. A balanced diet with plenty of fresh fruits, greens and stress-busting super foods can help counteract the physiological stress of the breakup, says Meyers.

    Another important thing, Meyers notes, is to avoid mindless eating and try not to turn food as a coping mechanism. Don’t worry about indulging a little, but try not to keep too much junk food around, as foods that are high in fat, sugar and salt can actually contribute to higher levels of the stress hormone cortisol.
     
  26. IreneJay

    IreneJay New Member

    Remind Yourself of All the Great Things in Your Life.

    “It’s so easy to see the loss as everything, and then it starts overwhelming the good in all of your life,” says Meyers.

    Painful breakups can cloud your thinking so that it’s almost impossible to look beyond the immediate feelings of pain and loss. You may have trouble remembering all the things you appreciate because you’re so focused on the negative. Practicing gratitude can help to even out your moods and get you get back into a more positive head space. Studies have shown that listing things you’re thankful for can boost your well-being and brighten your outlook on life.

    Meyers suggests keeping a gratitude journal to help turn your attention to the positive. You may initially have to force yourself to think of things you’re grateful for, but as you repeat the process, the bad won’t feel so all-consuming anymore. (And you might find yourself feeling thankful that you no longer have to deal with your ex’s bad habits!)
     
  27. IreneJay

    IreneJay New Member

    Do Things YOU Love.

    After a bad breakup, it’s hard to get excited about the things you loved pre-split — but the only way to start enjoying yourself again is to force yourself to get out and do them anyway. Treat yourself to something that make you feel good, whether it’s a cup of coffee with a friend or a massage. Self-care is essential to the healing process, and doing things that make you smile can help you heal.

    Try going to the movies to check out a new comedy or inviting your friends over to marathon-watch “Arrested Development”: Laughing has been shown to boost mood and improve overall health, and the support of your friends will help ease feelings of loneliness and isolation. Laughter helps us speed up healing, both emotionally and physically.
     
  28. IreneJay

    IreneJay New Member

    Try an ‘Obsession Diet.’

    Obsessing is a natural reaction to the end of a relationship but only for so long. Most of us have had to deal with a friend who can’t talk about anything but her ex for months after the breakup, and it’s not pretty. You don’t want to get to the point where your BFF s have to stage a friend-intervention to get you off the couch and out into the single world. To push yourself past the constant agonizing stage, recommends putting yourself on an obsession diet (not to be confused with the aforementioned, and unadvised, breakup diet). You have to wait for the next hour. The next day, reduce the time to four minutes, then three minutes, and so on. It’s giving yourself permission, says Meyers. If you’re trying to break the habit of thinking about your partner, giving yourself five minutes a day helps you to realize that you can control your thinking. It’s a way to channel the urge and also feel the sense of control.
     
  29. IreneJay

    IreneJay New Member

    Write or Talk It Out

    Although suppressing unpleasant feelings is a natural impulse, avoiding your emotions will ultimately prevent you from moving past them. There are so many emotions involved in a breakup anger, sadness, loneliness, feelings of rejection and uncertainty about the future and it’s essential to confront them head on. Particularly in the early stages of a breakup, try let yourself feel what you feel, without judgment. Writing out your thoughts in a journal, having a good cry, or talking to a therapist can help you process and gain the clarity you need to see why the relationship didn’t work and why you’ll be better off without your former partner. If you feel like crying, cry. If you’re pushing your feelings down, they’re just going to make you calloused or afraid.
     
  30. Mitzkie

    Mitzkie New Member

    Break up is never easy, it can leave us lost and heartbroken. Just look at the bright side that there is someone who is better and deserving for your love. Always remember that you have your family and friends to lean on. Treat yourself well and time will heal all your emotional wounds.
     

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