How to handle criticsm?

Discussion in 'Fiction Writing' started by Sumimaru, Apr 25, 2018.

  1. Sumimaru

    Sumimaru New Member

    I've written several fiction stories from anime like to medieval era. After finishing the story I always hesitate to let someone read it right away I make sure first that I've gone through the whole story again and make sure that everything is in order. I've experienced a couple of honest reviews from close friends but it got to a point that I heard so many bad things that it makes me wanna quit.
     
    2 people like this.
  2. Melancholy

    Melancholy New Member

    Unfortunately, I don't get many detailed criticisms (all my friends are too nice!) but I love getting feedback online.

    I've found the best way to handle criticism is, after reading/hearing, spend a couple minutes to look at it from a more objective viewpoint. Remind yourself that writing is a skill that is incredibly hard to master and that your work doesn't define you, and just because you made a mistake doesn't mean you're a bad writer. Remember: the only bad writer is one who doesn't try and improve!

    Try and remember that criticism isn't about you as a person, and it's only based on what they've read. One bad story doesn't define you. And make sure the comment is an actual feedback - someone saying "I don't like your story" isn't feedback, it's opinion, whereas saying "you have a lot of run-on sentences" is valid feedback.

    Hope that helps :)
     
    1 person likes this.
  3. warren7432

    warren7432 New Member

    For some people, criticisms are bad, but for some like me I take criticisms in a good way. Do not take it personally. Remember that criticisms does not define who you are. Criticisms must not let you down, instead use it to push yourself further. Accept constructive criticisms that people say to you because it is also for your betterment. Always take criticisms in a positive way and think that of it as advise that will help you fix your faults. However, you should never ever change yourself because of criticisms, instead show them that you are learning and improving from people who criticizes you, thanks to them.
     
  4. Geeneus

    Geeneus New Member

    Constructive criticism is one of the greatest gifts you can receive.

    We are not born great writers, it is something that is learned and practiced. Being a great writer takes continual improvement. The first step toward improvement is understanding what it is you need to improve on. That is what criticism provides; it provides a starting point, it opens a path for you to improve.

    Never forget that failure and success are not mutually exclusive, no, failures are the stepping stones toward success. Each mistake adds to your experience and brings you one step closer to something great. Understand that we all make mistakes, but that we can also accept them and learn from them. That's how we improve; that's how we become great at something.

    I know it can be hard to accept, especially when you are sensitive, but once you do you get to accept criticism as a gift.
     
  5. Hux

    Hux Active Member

    Criticism can be hard to handle, but it's important that it's handled professionally (depending on the circumstance). For example, when I first started designing and developing websites I'd receive criticism on certain designs, or how my code is structured. I learned to accept it and just say "Thanks for the criticism, I'll work on it!". If you take the criticism well, you can learn and develop from it. That's one way I've improved the way I design and code. It's important to also ask for criticism as you can't criticize your own work!
     
  6. cleanranks.com

    cleanranks.com New Member

    I was recently criticized by someone after seeing my landing page. He basically wouldn't believe I had worked with Walmart, Adobe, Ebay, as stated in my landing page. I simply responded my landing page was essentially a front door for me and my co-founders personal/professional experience, not as Cleanranks but as independent advisors. Anyway, he politely apologized for jumping to conclusions. I also noticed he kindly commented on this thread. I believe this teaches both of us a lesson. He's already stated his. Mine is updating y landing page before promoting it.
     
  7. aldridmae_fidel

    aldridmae_fidel New Member

    Almost everyone is having a history of criticism. I myself experienced it too. Most of the time it is really hard to handle especially if those people are using very harsh words. But always remember that there is always good in the word "criticism", it only means they read your works. All you have to do is to thank those who give positive feedbacks and eliminate those negative one. If you doubt yourself, don't be feel down. Go back to your works read it, if you read some mistake/s, there is a word edit. And if you can't then there is still the "next time". I'm sure it will help you to become the dream you really wanted to be.
     
  8. joyfulday95

    joyfulday95 New Member

    I'm a person who wants my every day to be positive as much as possible so I do take criticisms positively in a way where I use it as an image for me to reflect on my mistakes and the things I'm lacking with. For me, criticism is the cousin of advise. However, they may contain more hurtful words that are actually true sometimes and so we must reflect on them instead of arguing and insisting what we believe to be true about us.

    Criticism is actually one of the food that makes any writer a good writer. Writing is not just about compliments and praises, it will always contain criticisms that are actually more useful in making one's foundation stronger and firmer. For me, if there are no criticisms, a writer's craft is useless and mediocre, and that it does not have any element that can raise opinions and interest from readers.
     
  9. bdugie

    bdugie New Member

    I don't think the initial sting of criticism will ever go away, so don't fight it. Learn to be grateful. This person is taking time and energy to give you feedback and help you improve. It would be easier for them to sugarcoat it, stroke your ego, and move on. But they're taking the risk of upsetting you because they care.

    Of course, some people are just jerks and want to tear you down. But you can tell the difference. Those people have their own issues and can be ignored.
     
  10. lyrehc08

    lyrehc08 New Member

    We cannot please everybody as the old cliche' goes. Criticism will always be there for anyone. But how to handle them, that is one thing we need to learn how.

    Everyone is entitled to each and every opinion. Be it on a positive or negative side. Just as we receive any criticism, I think that it is best to use that one as a reflection of ourselves, whether she may be wrong or right. Place it still in the light of good perspective so it will still turn out to be something that is going to be beneficial for us as a person. Sometimes we need not be overly sensitive about criticisms as it may be the key for our own personal improvement.
     
  11. abyocaoi

    abyocaoi New Member

    In our society, criticism is present and even if we do what we think whats right, we're still going to be criticized about it. It is because we all have different perspective on everything and we cant please everybody. To handle criticism, of course be professional about it. Take it. Accept it. Reflect on it. Criticism can aslo makes us bold and true to ourselves and its up to us if we'll do something about it. For me, we should handle criticism with open arms, be open about it and act upon it on what we think is right and wont hurt or degrade other people as well.
     
  12. hgenoso

    hgenoso Member

    Listen!!! No matter how fraustraiting and scary it might be
    Listen!!! Pick up most of their words and just listen to what they are saying because it will help you balance out your works what to improve and not also find the right people to have critic to because some people do not kbow how to critic and that might affect you greatly, it could turn out to be a shit party rather listening for improvement.
     
  13. jahmie1128

    jahmie1128 New Member

    No matter what you do or say you cannot please everyone. Critics are there everywhere, but it doesn't need to be a hindrance or disappointment on how you see yourself. Id rather take criticism constructively, in such a way I am able to see the things that I need to improve in myself at the same time get some suggestions .
     
  14. kvillacorta9

    kvillacorta9 New Member

    Try to read it in your mind using a soft and gentle voice. Whenever I do that while reading criticisms even how much harsh it is, I don't feel too bad about it. I think that we should always think of it as a suggestion rather than a criticism.
     
  15. Vashuan

    Vashuan New Member

    Criticism is a form of unjust treatment of a person towards others. My way of handling criticism is simply ignore. It's the best and way to insult them back. The reasons why I'd simply ignore criticism, because I have so many important things and priorities to attend to and I have no time for them. I'll just take criticism as i'm one of their priorities for they have spend extra time to criticize me, and it's my pleasure.
     
  16. phansize007

    phansize007 Member

    What I would like to tell you Sumimaru, is that the way you handle criticism acts as an indicator of your level of maturity with regards to handling issues. Don't get me wrong because I mean no harm. All I'm saying is you will always get criticized whether you do wrong or right.

    Last but not least, quitting because of criticism only confirms what you critics are saying. So, please don't quit.
     
  17. jennyferm

    jennyferm New Member

    Most of us experienced getting bad and good criticism. I know it's not that easy to handle or to accept criticisms. I can just tell you to use it as a constructive criticism. I can tell you to use it as a motivation to do well and be a better person. But I know that it won't be that easy for you to see things just like how I see things on my own. I can even tell you to look on the positive side of it, but I know it wont be easy for some of you to see it that way.
    But I want you to know these things.

    1. People are born imperfectly. It is ok to make a mistake, experience is a good teacher am I right? But do not use it as an excuse to do the mistake again. You do it again, and it's not called a mistake anymore but a sin.
    2. We are not born to please others, we are born to please God and be kind.
    3.Whatever you do, good or bad, some people will say anything anyway. So just do whatever makes you happy as long as you are not hurting anyone.
    4.People who always thinks of what others will have to say is not happy at all, neither can sleep peacefully at nights.
    Mind what others will think of you, every day, every night. What will you get? depressions, anxiety, loneliness etc. All those that can ruin your peace of mind! baby you don't deserve any of that!
    So you make a choice, let them ruin your happiness? let them in your peace of mind?
    or go ahead and live your life to the fullest! We only live once dear, live happily with your loved ones. Don't let negativity control all through out your life! Mind what they say and you let them control you.
    Make a choice.
     
  18. Alyaskimoy

    Alyaskimoy New Member

    To handle a criticism is really tough as a freelance in writing. But I always put in my mind that those persons who criticize me, positive or negative criticism, they are my avid readers. Because I know, their criticism can really help me to find my mistakes or errors that need to improve. After all, those successful writers have even received criticisms. Just look at it as a good karma for you to be improved.
     
  19. Shaynako

    Shaynako Member

    Being sensitive to criticism can be a sticky situation. Sometimes people may even stop working toward a goal out of fear of being critiqued. But don’t give in to those worries about potential critiques. Here are some helpful tips to handle any kind of criticism that heads our way:
     
  20. 4TheBestWriter4

    4TheBestWriter4 New Member

    I first look at the tone of the person who critics me. If it is done in a manner to offend me and make me look like a fool I really don't give any thought to it and put that person in its place.

    If it is done by a colleague who I respect then I want to learn and improve. It's very important for us to always keep learning and improving our abilities in life.

    As you gain more experience and be under the light more you will be accustomed to the situation and manage it very well!
     
  21. "Nobody kicks a dead dog,"

    How true this is. You must have life to be kicked. Criticism comes to the person who has something in them. If you have nothing, you will receive no criticism. There is nothing to criticize really.

    I do the following if am criticized. I put on an imaginary umbrella. All criticisms fall on it and then to the ground and leave me as dry as a dry leaf.
     
  22. Brandym2004

    Brandym2004 New Member

    Listen to all, take what is useful and disregard the rest. You should always take criticism constructively and 'with a grain of salt.'

    You must also consider the source and intention of the person giving the criticism, If the criticism seems harsh but the intentions are good it might be hard to listen, but it also might be needed.
     
  23. kevlina

    kevlina New Member

    Great perspective! I've once heard a good story as well related to criticism.

    If someone has a loaf of bread and offers it to you, but you say no, who owns the bread, you or the giver?

    Obviously it's the giver, because you didn't accept it.

    Now if the giver is offering criticism, does anything change?
     
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  24. Nothing changes really. They still own their criticism.
     
  25. Nikko0209

    Nikko0209 New Member

    Well, first I will understand the criticism. If it would help me to become better, I will accept and change my attitude and actions. However, if it is just said just to hurt me, I would ignore it. People don't just give out something just to hurt people. Criticisms are good it they are reconstructive, otherwise not. Ignore hate, that would make you happier in your life.
     
  26. Chinet23

    Chinet23 New Member

    Someone posted that the friend who criticize you the most is your true friend. In the Scriptures, Proverbs says,
    "Wounds from a friend can be trusted,but an enemy multiplies kisses".

    I quoted these because I will handle criticisms separately depending on the intention of the source. We all know that there are constructive criticisms that we can benefit from. My pastor once told me if 2 or more persons are saying the same thing, then we should not take it lightly. There must be something we need to change or improve on.

    But if we are being criticized out of the blue on irrelevant matters and does not focus on the concern at hand, like for example our pointing on the physical appearance or any other derogatory remarks, then we have to muster all our patience to shrug it off. It's clear to see that they don't have good intentions. Yes some people can really be overly critical and hate just for the sake of hating. What they say tells more about themselves than the one criticized. No explanation can satisfy them.

    Keep an open mind. There are some you have to ponder about but there are some you just have to throw out of your window.
     

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